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Expats: the problem of fitting in when you go 'home'

The problem

Due to the ongoing pandemic, many expats have gone back to their home country. Some have gone by choice, while others have been given no other option but to return home. In any circumstances, it’s always a bigger challenge than people anticipate to adjust to living at ‘home’. There’s usually an expectation that moving home will be easier than moving to a new country. However, you will change in the time you’ve been away, and the people you know at home will also have had different experiences during your time away. Unfortunately, for many people, it’s not simply a case of fitting in like you may have done before you moved away.

Some great tips for fitting in when you return home

This BBC article shares a number of tips from expats on how to cope with fitting in once you move home. Based on the article, and the work I do, I’d like to share three great pieces of advice:

  1. Treat your move home like an assignment to a new and unfamiliar country.

    That way, you’ll do your homework before you move and get a better picture of what it’s like to live there now, rather than before you left. This will help to minimise the reverse culture shock which so often accompanies a move home.

  2. Manage your expectations

    Whether we realise it or not, all of us have expectations before a move. It’s perfectly natural. With a move home, people often have high expectations as to how easy it will be and how they will simply fit back in to their previous lives. When the reality is vastly different to these expectations, this can cause a lot of stress and distress.

  3. Actively look for other expats in your community

    When you live in different countries, you can change in so many ways. These may include your personality, your worldview and the way you interact with other people. With other expats, there is an immediate understanding of the highs and lows of living overseas, which help to connect with one another.

Looking for extra support?

I work with individuals and families to support emotional wellbeing throughout the relocation process. Please take a look at my resources which are designed to support expats, or send a message if you’re looking for personalised support.